PLEASE READ THIS:
NOTE: The characters Erika, Victor, and Carlos, will all be bumped up to about 50$ an episode. It's only 20 for now because they only have a few sentences of lines in the Pilot episode. (Price set to increase beyond 50$, I'm just in the middle of getting a new job as of posting this.)
Hi there my name is Lucas, and for the longest time I've been writing a comedy series called Life of Artificer. However it's time to spread our wings elsewhere! Enter THE CAGE!!!
The Cage is an audio drama centered around a massive space station. Here Death Row inmates are given a chance to sign up and fight to the death in various competitive games! All with the grand prize being a huge cash payout and a full pardon for their wrong doings. Aboard this station they'll compete against a variety of obstacles. Be it other psychopathic inmates, alien monstrosities from distant worlds, genetic experiments gone wrong, and even YOU the audience. Based on popular vote, demand, and such our audience will directly influence the show at large! So if you enjoy improv feel free to go crazy when delivering lines, I don't mind in the slightest.
WARNING: I don't want to make this show unnecessarily visceral since it is an audio drama, but it's still going to have heavy topics and be violent. So please understand you must be 18 or over to audition, and also be prepared for subject matter dealing with abuse, violence, and lots of criminal upbringings for these characters. Because of the nature of violence in the show, this project is considered NSFW by CCC standards. So again. You must be 18 or over to audition
WHO ARE WE
We are Heretical Fun House. You can find us on our two primary sites here:https://www.tiktok.com/@hereticaltavern
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCypW2TiELdqodyKIAwh3i0Q
For the past 2 years our focus has been on dungeons and dragons related content with a story following our chaotic band of crazies as they enjoy a comedic nature. So this will be a heavy shift towards new and uncharted territory for us!
REQUIREMENTS
Howdy everyone! I noticed while going through the project I accidentally missed adding two new characters! They are available now!
Grimmy - A shy, scared, and innocent member of the show that accidentally wound up where she shouldn't be. Can she survive?!
Dr. Wren Merigold- A cold, calculating, and ruthless researcher hellbent of ensuring humanity survives in a galaxy of competitors no matter the cost!
Thank you so far for all the amazing auditions!
One of two masters behind the hit game show. Emery is a very influential man. His voice type should be carefree, easy going, but we're looking for someone who can also flip it and speak in a very cold and villainous way.
Emery is a man that has clawed his way up to the shining palaces of the elite, and finds pride in having the masses eat from his hand for entertainment. While normally happy, cheerful, and sassy in his way of speak, the slightest inconvenience usually sends him into fury.
The character is 37, but we're not too worried if you can pull off something younger or older sounding.
Accent wise we also have no demands, do as you see fit.
FOR THE SECOND LINE:
(Context: the character you're speaking with told you that "The Network" is demanding you keep working to keep up the views. You, however, own the network. Start happy, but when you start with "Did you," I want cold anger. Like "How dare you think you can tell ME what to do"))
(Extremely happy and upbeat) Bobby! Bobby bobby bobby, My boy, my man, my bobby! Did you see those results?! Views are through the roof! Tickets sold out, and even the outlying colonies are tuning in. We need to celebrate!
(Read the character description) (After being "Threatened) Bobby, bobby, bobby! Baby, you’re killing me. Did you forget that I happen to own the Network?
(After throwing your desk, I want full anger here) Oh the Network wants this, the Network wants that, bunch of blood sucking parasites that can’t stand to see their bank accounts without oh so many zeroes on it. Fucking bastard, does he have any idea how much time, blood, and money I’ve dumped into this thing to get us to where we are?! I deserve a day off! FUCK! HIM! I want him and his family thrown out an airlock!
The second mastermind behind the show, and sister to Emery Visally.
Annabelle is the brawn and power behind the games. With an army of lawyers, media faces, and politicians in her pocket, she is not afraid of any challenge placed in her way.
Unfortunately, she and her brother share the same unstable emotional state. For the character we'll need someone able to go back and forth between emotions. When dealing with professionals, Annabelle is the picture of poise and proper. Behind closed doors and with any sort of issues, she's a walking firework of emotional outbursts.
(Extremely happy to speak to Naomi) Oh my god, Naomi hi! How are you! Are you and that Henry guy still together? Tell me everything. You know it's so nice that someone in this god forsaken galaxy is actually sweet. You know I- (Pause, you are being told the guy was actually abusive. Pull a 180 on personality) Well I always knew this would happen. He was rotten from the start, screw him, screw his family. You deserve better. You know we can probably kill him, just saying.
(After a particularly bad meeting.) (Strained short laugh) Alright... Wonderful... Are they gone? (Being told yes, you explode and start breaking things). Who the FUCK does he think he is?! I'm a goddamn titan of this industry! And he thinks he can talk to me like that?! (Pause) DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME TO CALM DOWN! (Scream as you are smashing a chair into a wall) (Heavy breathing, collect yourself, then with cold anger proceed) Get me Isabella. If he's this keen to talk down to me of all people, let him do it with that psychopath's gun in his mouth.
(Remaining extremely professional) As you can see here our facilities are of the best. Contestants will have the luxury of whatever they wish. A small token of our appreciation, to ensure they know exactly what sort of life style they'll be fighting for. And well, so the ethics committee at least has to scratch their head when talking to us (fake laugh) Moving on.
READ THE PROJECT DETAILS - The pay will increase in the season. The pilot episode only has a few lines for this character.
Age: 31
A redhead with a fiery temper and a foul mouth.
Currently serving life for contract killing, several counts of First-Degree murder, smuggling of illicit goods, resisting arrest, and the murder of an officer.
(Squaring up in combat) That supposed to scare me? HA! I killed guys like you on the daily just to get my exercise in. Bring it!
{After being insulted} (Snarl) YOU GOT SOME FUCKING NERVE TALKING TO ME LIKE THAT, BITCH! Don’t you know who I am?!
(Much more tender, but as if the concept is foreign to you) Just... Stop crying, or something. Shit sucks. But it gets better. I mean well... It gets better for like... I don't know, look just stop crying you'll be ok.
READ THE PROJECT DETAILS - The pay will increase in the season. The pilot episode only has a few lines for this character.
Age: 30
A netrunner that always has a plan.
Currently serving life for blackmail, ransom of government information, threatening politicians, cybercrimes, assistance to known criminal organizations, and first degree murder of a Federal Officer.
Snarky, sarcastic, adaptable, softy when it comes to the lonely and abandoned.
The character will be a mix of Hispanic/African American originally from old New York City so keep that in mind when auditioning. Accents from New York not required.
(Being hauled away by the police) H-Hey! Officer come on I got a pizza on the way can't we wait? (Grunt as you're being hit) Hey go easy, it doesn't have pineapple I swear.
(Shouting) Hey what about my one phone call? Hey! Hey what about my one phone call you bastards?!
(Slowly freaking out) Oh no no I'm cool, I'm cool, it's just I'm stuck with a psychopath, a narcissist, a junkie, and a genetic freak! All while the walls are slowly being eaten by weird bugs, the walls themselves are closing in, and NOT TO MENTION. . . I'm actually kinda hungry. So yeah, I'm fine.
READ THE PROJECT DETAILS - The pay will increase in the season. The pilot episode only has a few lines for this character.
Age: 62
Former Pirate turned Mercenary that worked as a PMC for the Wayfarer group.
Currently serving life for several counts of first degree murder, Intergalactic terrorism, Kidnapping, larceny, Piracy, ship theft, and violations to the Kades Agreement which barred the use of chemical weapons on neighboring empires conflicts.
Charismatic as hell, born leader, quick witted.
Character is originally spaceborne and picked up a Southern Drawl from the specific group of pirates he grew up with.
(Casually disagreeing with someone who said you murder good people) Ma’am. Please. I rob merchants, rival PMCs, and privateers. I never shoot at law enforcement, as long as they don’t shoot at me first. Why else would they love me as much as they do?
(In a standoff, fully ready to kill or be killed) This ends one of two ways, chief. Either I walk away with your tags wrapped around my neck. Or I die surrounded by bodies. Either way is fine with me.
(Berating someone for being an idiot) Hey, how about you shut up? Huh? It's a kid, you don't shout at kids. Have some class, Jesus, it's like you people grew up in a barn.
You are the life of the party, THE Neon. People know your voice far and wide and you aim to entertain the masses. For this we're definitely looking for someone over the top in their delivery of lines. You'll be describing traps, monsters, and of course various gruesome deaths of players.
While I don't plan to make it extremely visceral, you will need to have the ability to describe characters meeting their end with all the joy and showmanship of basically describing a sponsorship.
So get your gameshow host voice on for this one!
(After watching a contestant meet their end) OH OUCH! That's gotta hurt! Well folks it's like we always say, it pays to have good eyesight. Let's get a replay of that there (brief pause) Now that's a hell of a way to go! Impalement is always messy. Let's go to the Crypt to get stats on that dead guy. Over to you Jenny!
Good evening folks, and welcome back to another exciting episode of... THE CAAAAAAAGE! Tonight we have one hell of an episode. Watch as The Banshee and the Revenant go head to head! In an off the walls no holds bar, to the death cage match! The victor will walk away with a new Bermuda rifle courtesy of Ranger Corp, which will be used in the next round! (Swap to advertising voice) Ranger Corp, because when the cops are 15 minutes away, you need a big iron to put those junkies in the ground if they come a knocking. Use Code CAGED to get 10% off any bulk ammo order.
(Outside of the game) Annabelle, baby, please. It's me. I'm a fucking legend to these peons. They're eating out of my platinum hand and begging for more. You see a tragedy, I see a way to twist the meat hook around and sear up some fine steaks. Have no fear, I'll have the masses convinced this was all part of the plan with one single post on the Gal-Net.
The wingman to Neon. For this we need a professional tone, between the age of 20-30, who can easily portray a sort of sports castor that goes over various "Stats" that contestants have.
As the show progresses, Jenny will be more integral as a sort of Rival to Neon and play into a bit of corporate espionage. So be ready for that.
(Having the camera pan to you) Happy to be here tonight, Neon. So as we can see here Jakobs "The Bat" had quite the season here on the Cage. Seven kills with his signature nail gun. Long time fans know that seven is quite the number to get for first timers. No doubt Jakobs will be missed.
(Off camera) And when the hell am I gonna get my chance? Three seasons I've been at the beck and call of that diva. I deserve a spot on the front. Haven't I paid my dues?
(Some back and forth banter with a very tense feeling, but you're remaining professional) Oh no I could never pull that off, I don't have the bravery to wear such a thing (fake laughter) but well folks it's time for everyone's favorite part of the evening. Stats with me, Jenny. So then- (Stop as you're cut off)
The Consigliere and personal assistant to Emery Visally. Naomi is the right hand woman, bodyguard, Enforcer, and "problem solver" when someone steps out of line.
For this voice we need someone very cool, cold, and almost disinterested in what they do. To Naomi, she's already made it in life. In a cruel and vast galaxy she has a high paying job, access to any sort of entertainment, a comfortable life, and a front row seat to the world of show business; and Naomi has no intention of losing it.
There will be times where Naomi speaks more openly and human like, but for the most part we need someone able to pull off the "I don't care either way" voice.
Best voice reference would be Frieren from Frieren Beyond Journey's End.
(Being asked not to kill someone) Why what ever do you mean sir? I haven't killed anyone in over a decade, and have no intention of doing so now. Any recent implications are purely circumstantial and wouldn’t hold up in a court of law.
(Holding a gun to someone's head) You just don't get it do you? I can't be bought and sold like some common good. You could offer me all the money in the galaxy but it wouldn't compare to what I'm paid now (Pause) No, in this life. . . Loyalty is worth more than a world. If it's any comfort, I will miss our conversations, old friend.
(Still kind of cold, but give it a smile while saying this) I enjoyed today, if I'm being honest. Despite the hardships and well the... Attempt on your lives. I find that this was a very fun use of my time. I look forward to doing it again.
A producer that acts as a middle man to discuss what the board members want, and translates it to Emery about what he has to do.
For this voice we're looking for an older male sounding voice. Very much a "Talent acquisition" kind of attitude .
(Annoyed as Emery keeps dodging the request) I understand that, Emery, but look we’ve already got some candidates that we want Nexus Talent to look at. No one else wants to be the one to break the news to Annabelle, so please?
Look, Emery, it's out of my hands alright? That's what the partners want. You want to piss them off? That's on you. But you know what happens if they pull out. Alright we don't have the funding to keep everything afloat, and the first thing they'll want to cut is Nexus Talent. You can tell Annabelle to work, or you can tell her she's getting cut. Your call.
An AI Assistant providing helpful tips in games, reading advertisements, and overall being a sort of corporate "mascot" for The Cage.
You don't need to sound dead like an AI, but feel free to play around with it as you wish!
(Note: just in case of any confusion the CHARACTER is an AI. There will be NO machine learning or actual AI voice shenanigans allowed in this series)
Update: The character is extremely helpful and bubbly so feel free to do something a lot more upbeat!
(Providing tips) You appear to be heading the wrong way. Shall I assist and upload coordinates for the new hill control zone to your ICD? Note: Damage of the ICD will not result in a new one being provided.
(Closing statement after helping) Thank you, we wish you luck, and remember. In The Cage, anyone can make it big! Note: Survival is not guaranteed, please read the fine print of any contracts.
(Reading an ad) Hi there everyone! Oracle here, do you find the mornings are a bit to dreary? Are you having trouble starting the day? Consider HypeXia - the caffeine rich drink guaranteed to get your heart pumping in seconds! Now available for a limited time only! Note: This product may cause Hypoxia, please drink responsibly. Ronin Entertainment is not to be held liable for irresponsible use.
Extras for this series will take on a variety of roles. No less than 5$ will be paid for single lines, with more to be added for multiple lines/roles.
We have prisoners, soldiers, audience members, "special guests" and even future characters if this pilot takes off.
Prisoners: (Feel free to throw in some creative insults and banter) (Please also include screams or "death rattles" in case you get a character that perishes in the game)
Soldiers: (Some basic orders. "Prisoner move here" or "That's it, line up" whatever you think fits)
Extras: (Or feel free to submit basic voice samples showing what you sound like.)
A heavily augmented young woman, Grimmy was unfortunate to wind up on The Cage accidentally, and now faces the horrors of the galaxy as an almost innocent bystander.
The character is in her early 20's and tries to be extremely passive. She prefers to avoid violence and hates when she has to fight back against anything. But she's no push over.
For this voice we're looking for something very feminine and shy, but with the ability to yell as needed for combat scenarios Grimmy will face.
Shut up! Shut! Up! You killed my friends! Stop talking about them like they’re just numbers! (Pause - you're threatened and attacked) I said leave me alone! RARGH! (Swinging heavy object)
(Scared and desperate to diffuse a situation) P-Please don't fight, violence isn't the answer here. It won't solve anything. L-Let's just share ok? That could be a good middle-ground, w-won't it?
(Mesmerized) Whoa... It's so... Pretty... No one said the stars could look like that (Pause) No I... Never got to see them outside the lab... I saw pictures but this... It's beautiful.
A ruthless and cold hearted researcher with a vendetta against any and all Non-Human life in the galaxy. Dr. Merigold believes with absolute certainty that is the duty of humanity to take its destiny into its own hands by any means. Augmenting and improving themselves by any means to compete in a galaxy full of creatures far stronger than humans are.
She has no qualms using people as experiments, funded by shadowy benefactors across the galaxy, and in wholly unfeeling in her research. To Dr. Merigold, the cost of a million lives are worth it if humanity is guaranteed even a chance to survive.
For this voice we need someone cold, cunning, able to deliver lines with condescending and disdainful energy.
Dr. Merigold is middle age, between her 40's and 50's so keep that in mind when using this voice.
Do not argue with me, Subject 27. Their sacrifice is in the pursuit of human sanctity. Without them there is no humanity. Without YOU there is no humanity. Come back to the lab, 27, we have work to do.
It doesn't have a name, it has a designation. R-27. Return it to me at once and our business will be concluded. (Pause) Or continue to waste my time, and shorten your life span considerably.
(Angry and shouting. You're dealing with idiots that don't get it) This is for humanity! Look around you! Everything out there is bigger than us, stronger, faster, smarter. All we have up our sleeve is adaptability. We survive! We stand atop a mountain of bones, drenched in the blood of our enemies... AND WE SURVIVE! (Calm down) I will sacrifice anyone and anything to ensure humanity is not just a footnote in history.
