Briar Studios: Twisted Wonderland

Uh, you want me to stay... here? This is too much character, if you ask me. It's like a desolate snowscape. Only with dust... I don't even see a clean place to sit.

I've never seen that creature before in my life! I've told you repeatedly that it isn't mine!

I wanted to wish you a happy birthday. How's it feel to be celebrating your birthday?

Myah ha ha ha! Man, was that great! Don't worry about me. I don't got a weak stomach like you humans do.

Heh? You want ME to help YOU? Ha! You got the wrong idea. I'm just a stranger takin' shelter from the rain. You ain't the boss of me. If ya had some cans of tuna to trade, well, that'd be another story. But I don't work for free.

I... I'll get to go to this school...? As an actual student? Not a janitor?! Myah... Myah... [...] I... I finally...MYAAAAAH! I FINALLY DID IT!

We're done with orientation and dorm assignments? All right, new students—let me be clear. At Heartslabyul House, I am the law. Break the rules, and it's off with your head!

Do you think I enjoy having to do this?! You're the one who broke the rules! As much as I would like to, I cannot ignore these infractions. It's for your own sake. Understood? Trey? Cater? Remove him from the premises.

What? Was my magic overwritten by yours? Does that mean your signature spell is stronger than mine?! Are YOU going to tell me that I'm wrong too? After all I've done to protect the rule of law?! Do you know how much I've suffered for this?! I... I refuse to believe this! But... I'm right! I'M the one who's right! There is NO! POSSIBLE! ALTERNATIVE!

Ah ha ha. That's how Cater shows he cares. Ah, I should introduce myself. The name's Trey. Trey Clover. I'm a junior at Heartslabyul, like Cater here. And you must be Yuu, the new prefect from that dump of a- ah, I mean, the "rustic" dorm. I heard the whole story from Cater. Thanks for looking out for our boys yesterday.

Haha. I was kidding when I said I put it in chestnut tarts, but I'm serious this time. It's used a lot with meat. It adds a certain depth of flavour. I also top my hamburger steak with the perfect sunny-side up egg. The nice, runny yolk mixes with the hot juices of the meat… You can imagine it, right?

I'm sorry, Riddle. I knew you were suffering, and all I did was pretend not to notice. So I'm gonna say what I should have said earlier. Your way of doing things was wrong, and you owe everyone an apology.

Right? It really isn't half as bad as you'd think. Look, I'm not saying it's amazing or anything! Huh? Yeah, you got me. But how did you figure it out? I've never told anyone that. Ack! My secret is out! This is so so embarrassing! Especially after what happened to you and Riddle. I should have learned by now that keeping your feelings on the DL is not a great idea.

Oh, someone's messaging me on Magicam. Whoa, look who it is! Man, it's been forever. Step one: make the school Halloween event go viral through the ghosts at Ramshackle Dorm. Step two: post THE megathread about it on my Magicam account. Step three: profit with a major bump in followers! And that's all been well and good. Thing is, with so many new followers, my notifications are blowing up hard with replies and DMs from old IRL acquaintances. And when I say "old," I mean, like, elementary school old. I just go with the flow and reply with stuff like "Hey, long time no see! Wanna come visit the school? You're always welcome!" And "Come check how NRC does Halloween! You won't regret it!" Or at least, emoji that convey those sentiments.

Thanks! This calls for a pic of my hard-working sophomore bud. Strike a pose! Aaand straight to Magicam it goes! #NRC #PreUnbirthday #Silverware #PreUnbirthdaysArePremium

You want me to cast a spell to stop him? Like, freeze his legs? Or bind them with a rope? Or maybe I could... Hmm... No… Anything?! Anything, huh… All right! Here goes anything! I summon thee... something heavy!

I do this whenever things aren't going my way and I get all out of sorts. I drive to the beach and let it all out at the top of my lungs. It always makes me feel better. For as long as I can remember, I've been a slow learner. I'd study hard, but my grades always stayed below average. I wanted an excuse for why I did so poorly in school... So over time, I started taking the easy way out. "I'm not even trying. Of course my grades are bad." "It's lame to be a try-hard." You know, stuff like that.

You didn't? I think every man's gotta make a grab for glory at least once in his lifetime. And if we're teaming up to take him down, ya better believe I'm running the show!

You don't know the Queen of Hearts? She was a queen who lived in a maze-like garden of roses long, long ago. She was a strict woman who prized order above all. She wouldn't tolerate a rose being off-colour, or her playing-card soldiers being out of step. She basically ruled over a kingdom of madness, but not one of her subjects dared to defy her. You wanna know why? Because the punishment for breaking a rule was immediate decapitation! Pretty cool, right? I'm a big fan. I mean, who would bother to obey a queen that was kind all the time?

Pfft... Ah ha ha! I can't hold it back anymore! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Come on, you're the ones who turned orientation into such a fiasco, right? The one summoned by the Dark Mirror who can't even use magic, and the monster no one summoned at all. It took everything I had not to burst into laughter right in the middle of the ceremony!

......All right, now I get it. It's YOUR fault Riddle's like this. Riddle didn't get to choose his parents. But you know what his parents did to him, and you know it was wrong, right? Well, now Riddle's making the exact same mistake that his parents did. You're going easy on him because he had it rough as a kid? Don't you see where that's leading? You're letting him make a pariah out of himself! So why don't you say something? Are you just afraid you'll "lose your head" too? That's pathetic! You guys are supposed to be childhood friends?! Then act like it.

Bah, it's a beautifully sunny day and they're stuffing their faces with cookies and cake? Grossin' me out over here. Anyway, Ruggie. You know that's not what I'm here to ask you about. Then those fools won't be happily guzzling tea for much longer. That goes double for that snob Malleus. They got no idea what's comin'... Heh heh. Ah ha ha ha ha ha!

The King of Beasts from the Great Seven won his throne through cunning and persistence. You all should be wrackin' your brains, trying to come up with a way to beat that monster! Whichever team figures that out is gonna be sittin' REAL pretty on the world stage. Are you gonna let a once-in-a-lifetime chance like that get yanked out from under you?

Hah... Ha ha. Yeah, you're probably right. No, you're EXACTLY right...! Ha ha ha ha! I will never become king. No matter how hard I try! I've been loathed since the day I was born. I've never had a place, never had a future! None of my hard work is ever rewarded! How could any of YOU possibly understand? MY disappointment?! MY pain?! AAAAAAAAAH!

Awww, sounds like those Heartslabyul twits are having some kind of feast today. Must be nice. How come Savanaclaw doesn't have any traditions that involve eating lots of free food? …Ah, that. Just leave it to me, Boss. All the preparations are proceeding smoothly!

Y-you can't just...! Malleus might still be in the game, but we took out all the other dorms' best players, right? But without you on the field, I don't even know if we'd have a shot at the top three! You're just going to abandon our dreams?

My family? Well, my mom joined the stars in the sky right after she had me. And my dad went out to scrounge up some money one day and never came back. No idea where he is or what he's doin' now. So I guess the only stories I could share are from birthdays I spent with my grandma. My family struggled just to put food on the table every day, so we couldn't afford any big fancy birthday cakes. Instead, Grandma would make me donuts every year. That was always a highlight.

This is a sport. You research the most effective workout method and make a realistic training plan. It's all about proceeding rationally towards your goal. That's what got you this far, right?

Housewarden Leona, I want you to know... I only came to this school because of how much I admired you! What happened to the man you used to be?

It really is. Nothing beats tearin' through a winter wonderland covered in snow! But snowy mountains'll always have some tricky cliffs I can't negotiate, even in my wolf form. I hear stories about sleds falling down 'em too. Plus, being in wolf form constantly drains my magic reserves. It may give me a huge boost physically, but I have to stay on my toes.

New students! Allow me to be the first to congratulate you on your achievement. As dorm leader of Octavinelle House, I am honoured to have the opportunity to support you in what I hope will be a fulfilling campus experience.

I-I'll do anything. I'll give you all the study guides you want. I'll write your graduation thesis. I'll pay for your attendance. Anything—just name it!

Ooohhh, is that a fact? I'm just a silly little octo-twerp who can't do anything on his own. That's why I'm going to take everyone's powers. I will rise above your perceptions. A beautiful singing voice! Powerful magics! All of it, MINE! Hand it all over at once!

As you wish. Now, now, there's no need to flinch. This won't hurt one bit. If you could look my way? Yes, just like that, thank you. Shock the Heart. Now, let's try this again. Why didn't you respond to Azul's summons yesterday?

Hold on. Your signature spell is so powerful, it's impossible to control without a contract scroll. You know better than anyone what will happen if you do this! He's using his signature spell too much. The blot is exceeding his cumulative tolerance! If he doesn't stop......he's going to overblot!

Of course, I'm seeing many new faces today. This is our chance to expand our clientele. Floyd is keeping an eye out to ensure our customers are treated with care.

Aha ha ha! What a bunch of schmucks! Why would you even try when you know how this is gonna go? I'm gonna squeeze you all, ooone byyy ooone.

Oh, that's easy. Takoyaki! Ever heard of it? It's like a little round pancake with octopus inside it. You know it? Most of the guys here have no idea what it is. I didn't know you were such a foodie, Little Shrimpy. I had some just recently with Jade and some other Octavinelle guys after we'd closed the lounge for the night. You'd be surprised how tricky it is to flip 'em when they're cooking, but I've done it a ton so I'm basically a pro. Sometimes I like putting other stuff inside, instead of just octopus. Keeps me from gettin' bored.

You were sucking everybody's magic dry left and right, bawlin', "Give me your poweeerrr!" It was the cringiest thing I've ever seen. I'm still not over it.

Honestly, I can't blame you there. I bet Riddle and the others were just as let down. Okay, I'm calling off the call-off! I'll throw the best party ever on my own!

Now, Epel, don't cry. If you keep crying like that...it's gonna make me cry tooooo! WAAAH!

A mere six hours a day won't be anywhere near enough to close the gap between our dorm and the others. We must work twice—no, FIVE times as hard as the others to drag ourselves out from dead last in grades! Starting tomorrow, I'm tasking all of you with five hours of study time and four hours of practical training each day.

Oh, thank you. I'm glad to be here, but I confess it's a bit strange as well. Most of the time when there's a party, I'm usually the one doing the cooking, the decorating, the inviting...Being the guest of honour's an adjustment for me. I saw that Kalim and the others were scrambling to get everything ready, and like a fool, I just had to say something. Which inevitably led to me setting up my own party.

I'd say so. Middle school was the first point in my life where I had some time and space to myself. I had friends I could talk with about anything. We'd study together, practice dancing, go out in town and get into trouble… It was also the first time I got into a really bad fight with a friend. We went days without talking, all because of the stupidest thing…

You've been the same for as long as I can remember. Oblivious, gullible, foolish... AND I HATED IT! You trot along merrily in ignorant bliss, utterly blind to my suffering! Every time I see you smile, it makes my skin crawl! I'm sick of it! There's no point in maintaining my facade now. You have no idea how many days I've spent wishing that you would just go away. But that ends today! Myself, my family... I don't care about ANY of it anymore!

As you know, I accepted the role of supervising the school's costumes this year. And costumes and makeup are inextricably linked. Which means we will need distinctive makeup to match each dorm's coordinated attire. I believe you all already have an idea of what you will be wearing this year, yes?

Well... Thank you. I suppose we both want what we don't have. Say, Neige. Are you thirsty at all? I brought you some apple juice. I've been quite taken with this brand recently.

Ha... Aha ha... That's what I want to know. More than the rest of you, even. But you see, I've come to a realisation. That I! Can never! Win! And that's why…I'm going... TO HANDLE NEIGE MYSELF!

Oh my! Quite the ferocious scowl you have there. I'm sure those sharp teeth of yours could easily bite through an angler's net. Trés bien!

Oh là là! How inquisitive you are. Believe me, I can sympathise. When I grow curious about someone, I feel a powerful urge to pursue them everywhere. Remember, Trickster─secrets are all the sweeter when they remain just that.

Vil. Nobody should believe in your beauty more than you yourself. It is most becoming, the way you maintain such rigid self restraint while polishing yourself to triumph over your rival. But as long as you lack conviction… No amount of validation from the rest of the world will ever leave you fulfilled. Even if you wind up old, emaciated, grimy, and stooped over...If you were to truly believe that you are the fairest of all despite that, even the Magic Mirror of legend wouldn't contest your claim. The strength and pride to believe in yourself is what marks the true fairest one of all. Roi du Poison. Fair Vil. I implore you to believe in yourself more than anyone else. Beauty is always with you. At this exact moment, you are the fairest one of all.

The well has an echo, so it's a good way to hear the sound of your own voice. Housewarden Vil instructed me to practice my singing here.

Oh, Ah'm from Harveston. It's way off in the mountains in the north part of the Shaftlands. Vil says not to talk much around people on account o' mah accent bein' hard ta understand. Every time Ah open mah mouth, Vil gets on mah case. "Don't speak with an accent. Address people by name. Mind your volume." Drives me nuts, Ah tell you what!

Back home, the only way anybody ever saw you as powerful was if you were big an' buff an' strong. ...So Ah've always been a soft target fer teasin'. Lookin' back now, Ah don't think Vil meant nothin' by what he said, but still…

You really think so?! Look, I mean, I'm not that special. But you all keep talking about me like I'm the best, so what does that say about you? Sure, I pay some attention to detail, but I'm middling at most. Maybe I'm just the best option in THIS group. I'm still mediocre, of course! I definitely don't merit the praise you're throwing my way. Dyeh heh…

For our display, I figured we could use projection mapping to replicate backgrounds and sound effects from the movie... And then I'd pop out as the Pumpkin Knight. But fans would know what happens, and at the same time, I wouldn't wanna spoil the movie for people who haven't seen it yet. So I put in a twist—using visual tricks with reflections and lighting to make it look like my head's gone when I take off the helmet. Whee hee hee.

You absolute PEONS. You did it AGAIN! You’re gonna pay for that! […] Why do you guys have to constantly stand in our way? Are you wannabe heroes or something? Talk about cringe!

If I can't enter the main building, then my brother's gonna be all alone in his classes for a whole week. And there's nothing he hates more than having to be around other people by himself.

Running simulation of Idia Shroud rescue mission. Priority: Shortest time to achieve objective. Simulation completed successfully. Commencing live operation. Charging technomantic energy. Target: Night Raven College, main building. Technomantic beam firing in five, four, three, two…

Oh, sure! We play competitive phone games a lot. See, I don't play computer games as a general rule. I can easily identify optimal strategies and win most games without effort. It's not all that fun. But it's different when I'm playing with dormmates! No matter how many times they lose, they keep coming up with new strategies and trying again. It's fun competing against them. I hear they're even working together to write up an anti-Ortho strategy guide.

Ah. You've returned. Who would have ever expected you to win a bet with Ashengrotto? For as doe-eyed as you look, you're quite the schemer. Really? I wasn't trying to offer some cryptic clue or the like. Heh. In any case, I'm glad to know this garden will remain nice and quiet. Ashengrotto's calm features contorting in frustration must have been quite the sight. Would that I could have been a fly on the wall. Mm... It seems I had best be returning to my dorm now. I bid you goodnight.

At first glance, these gargoyles appear to be imposing, dangerous monsters...but in reality, they are a kind of drainage spout built to keep rainwater from sullying the walls. They look frightful, and yet they are beings devoted to the preservation of their home.

You're being overactive for your age yourself, Lilia. Your breath is growing ragged. Perhaps you need a nice rest in a rocking chair.

Ah. Just as I'd expected. I figured I'd come down and see for myself whether Malleus had made an appearance. But once again, he was evidently not informed that his presence was required at an official ceremony. No matter. All who were assigned to House Diasomnia, follow me. I just hope he doesn't sulk about this.

Would that the lion king of the savanna could witness this absolute farce. No, if you ask me, the collar suits you far better than a crown ever could. You may bemoan the fact that you're not higher in line to be king. But with that sensitive ego of yours? That so quickly directs all your petty anger at your retainers… Well, the idea of you ever contending with a REAL king like our Malleus—is absolutely laughable. Even if you COULD defeat Malleus, so long as that's how you choose to conduct yourself? You would never be fit to rule!

You need not gawk at us from afar. You may feel free to speak with us directly. We are schoolmates, are we not? All of us at Diasomnia House welcome you without reservation.

Now that Fa— er, Lilia and Sebek are absent, I’m the only one left to guard Malleus.

That's right... Though I've spent a lot of time with Sebek, ever since we were young. We learned swordsmanship and martial arts from my father, and we even did rigorous training sessions together on occasion. You could say we were raised like siblings. We've sparred many times, and when I see Sebek hard at work, it inspires me to train that much more.

I'm an orphan. My father adopted and raised me. I thought he was my real father at first. Of course, it's obvious now just how radically different we look. One day, I finally noticed our ears were nothing alike, so I asked him why that was. That was the first time I learned that we were different races, and we weren't related by blood. "You never noticed?" I remember how he laughed. I was so confused and upset, I fled the house and ran out into the pouring rain.

It won't be so inordinate if something happens to him. You must never relax, even for a second! Or do you not understand the gravity of your duty as guardsman?! You are lucky that he and Lilia took you in and raised you despite your humanity. Don't you dare forget it!

None could stand against Malleus and Diasomnia. It was a one-sided tournament. He summoned giant mountains at his goal, protecting it from rivals. By the end, the entire arena rumbled with peals of thunder! The skill... The majesty! He was the very image of the Thorn Fairy herself!

First, I have club duties! I'm naturally expected to do riding practice in the Equestrian Club. Tending to the horses and cleaning the stables can be demanding, too. Once I'm done there, I return to my dorm room, where I sit down and study for a time. I prepare for my next day's classes, review material, finish homework, formulate plans for exams... And when I tire, I begin training.

Dear me. Of all the students I've dealt with, you're the first with temerity enough to open their own gate and step out of it. Does the very notion of patience elude you? No matter. Your orientation has already begun. Let us return to the Mirror Chamber.

Well, this is quite the predicament. I cannot have someone with no aptitude for magic bumbling about my magic academy. And yet, as an educator, I am loath to expel a young person without a cent to their name, or any ability to contact their guardian...Truly, my grace is boundless. Hmmmmm... Ah! There is a vacant building on this campus. It was, in fact, used as a dorm a long time ago. With a proper cleaning, it should be habitable enough. Out of the profound kindness of my heart, I will allow you to live there for the time being. In the meantime, we will investigate other ways to send you home. Dear me, but I am a gracious man indeed! A model educator, one might say. Well then, I shall take you to your dorm straight away. It is an older building, but it has plenty of...character, one might say.

"Overshot it" is putting it mildly. Fortunately the cat is unharmed, but...had you been off by a smidgen, the consequences would have been even more dreadful. Why did you deem such an action acceptable?!

Ah. You must be my new homeroom students. Hm, that's quite the unusual coat of fur. Do make sure that you arrive properly groomed. My name is Divus Crewel. You may call me Master Crewel. Now, take your seats. Class is about to begin. We're going to start with the basics. And by that, I mean beating the names and distinguishing characteristics of one hundred herbs and poisons into your tiny brains.

The test is over, whelps. Put your pens away and hand over your answer sheets like good little dogs. And with that, I do believe exams have come to a close. Down! SIT! Don't start celebrating yet. Any bad boys who fare poorly in their exams......will be given mandatory remedial lessons over the winter holidays. Consider yourself warned. Class dismissed.

You appear to have studied a great deal for this exam. Yes... A great deal indeed, compared to your quiz scores. In fact, the class average has gone up to a degree one might call...unusual. The average test scores across every level of potionology are over 90. Professor Trein has remarked upon similarly positive trends in his magic history classes. The school's fifty highest achievers will be posted in the hall. You can look forward to seeing that shortly.Now, let us begin today's lesson. Open your textbooks.

Have you seen Lucius? My precious Lucius? [...] The outside world is full of dangers. As we stand here chatting, any number of grim fates could be befalling him! Oh, my sweet Lucius!

What's going on here?! Don't give me that. A pair of freshmen with singed hair just burst into the faculty office, shouting about a robot going haywire. And what do I find but a scorched hallway and a half-destroyed pillar. Ortho Shroud, is this your doing? Not one iota of remorse, I see... Ortho Shroud, I hereby bar you from entering the main school building for one week.

Do not make light of this subject. I see now that you have been slacking off from the start. Very well. If you fail the next test, I will take appropriate measures. Be prepared.

Hey, my little imp. Can't find what you want? Leave it to me. I'll have it for you in the blink of an eye.

Wait a minute—these are the Night Raven College Waffles my store sells! This is wack. No—WIGGITY wack! The trash bin is overflowing with them, and they're all over the ground and in the bushes. I had these waffles specially made using jam from Night Raven College apples, even. What was wrong with them?!

Want the apple of your eye to favor you? To ensure that when you pop the question, she says, "I do"? Then you're in luck! I have a plethora of goods made to win over your one and only. IN STOCK NOW! ...Or at least I did, until you bought my entire supply. Thanks for your patronage, Headmage!

Okay, kids, listen up! Night Raven College doesn't just have stellar sports clubs. We've also got crackerjack arts and culture clubs. BUT! Are you really satisfied with the status quo? Every student here wants to be like me—a paragon of mental acuity and physical fortitude.

You listen here, Clover! You think you can show up late to MY class?! And you're late on a test day, too—which means you've earned yourself a whopping zero. I might even have to hold you back a year. At least...that's what I'd normally say, but you get a free pass today! With the way you saved Asim? Course you do! You did a beeeeaUTIFUL hammerhead and inside loop straight into a knife-edge. And all at top speed! In short, you passed every part of the exercise with flying colours! I never knew you could move like that! Always good to see someone really benefit from my lectures! Bwahahaha!

I call it CAMP VARGAS! You've got some serious sculpting to look forward to! Next week, we're going on a three-day camping trip in the mountains. You'll be testing your mettle in the great outdoors against several special challenges I've cooked up. Anyone who surmounts these challenges will be well on their way to becoming a strapping stud like me.

I'm Mickey. Mickey Mouse. Am I dreaming again? I've had this same dream three times already. There are always living cards and a dancing music box, too… But your voice gets clearer and clearer every time. Is it possible that you're not a dream? Where are you?

I told some friends of mine about what you said in my last dream… But Donald and Goofy have never heard of Twisted Wonderland, either. Donald even said it was a ghost prank, and that I shouldn't listen!

Hiya! Top of the evening to you! It's been a while. How've you been? I wonder how long it's been since we last met. Then again, maybe "met" isn't the right word. I only see you in my dreams. I've been trying to get back to this dreamland ever since, you know. I've tried wearing the same pajamas, reading the same book before bed, you name it! But nothing seems to work. So how come I made it here tonight? I didn't do anything special.

There is no such place. There is no place in this world where this soul belongs. None.

Yuu... The nature of your soul is... ...... ...... ...unclear to me.

I sense no magical power from this one. Soundless. Colorless. Shapeless. Utterly vacant. Therefore, no dorm would be appropriate.

Yee hee hee... Bwa ha ha ha ha ha. We haven't had visitors in ages! Oh, I'm just itchin' for new friends! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha!

All the people who used ta live here got scared of us and ran away.

We just want a new ghost to play with! What do you say, buddy?

...neeevvvaaa... ...iiivvv... ...ooouuu...Stooonesss... Stooonesss aaare miiiiine!

Begone! Begone! Begooone! Rrroooarrrgh!

GWAAAAAAAH! Nooo giiive yooouuu stooooooone!

You're really racking up those collars. Quite the impressive collection. Oh dear. It seems I'm not all here.

Mm mm mmm! Your baked goods are always so delightful, Trey. *munch* *munch* Hm? I came to celebrate my unbirthday with all of you. A very merry unbirthday to you, Riddle.

Well, now that I've tasted some tart, perhaps I should see myself out.

That's enough classical magic study for today. Your homework is to read the first fifty pages of the philosophy of language book referenced in today's magical philosophy texts. You may now have one hour of independent study before your potionology lesson.

Absolutely not! Those tarts are monstrously unhealthy. I might as well feed you poison! Even just a single slice would exceed your recommended daily intake of sugar. Now, dinner tonight will be a tuna sauté rich in DHA and omega-3 fatty acids. Now that you're eight, your caloric intake should be 600 kilocalories per meal, so don't eat more than 100 grams of it. Understood?

I cannot believe this! Not only are you cutting independent study time, but I find you eating a mountain of sugar?! Those two hoodlums must have incited this behavior. You must never play with them again!

Thank you. But, Mom... Just once, I'd like to try one of those tarts covered with bright-red strawberries...

I can't. I'm supposed to be doing independent study, and I have a lot of homework to do.

I'm sorry, Mother! I promise, it will never happen again.

I mean, you probably shouldn't eat too much of it, but calling it "poison" is kinda...yikes. You know, my family runs a cake shop. Let's go get a tart right now! Just one slice. It'll be fine.

Just play with us for a little bit! Hey, what's your name?

I'm Che'nya, and that's Trey. Let's all play croquet! Oh, but it's LOTS of fun!

"Independent study" means you pick what to do, right? My grandpa says play is a form of study!

Whaaat? You've never even tried a strawberry tart? They're out of this world. One slice for YOU, maybe. I want a whole one!

Draconia... Like, Malleus Draconia? THAT Draconia?

Riddle Rosehearts? Seriously?! Whoever it is has gotta be outta his mind. Riddle will have his head off in five seconds flat.

You think you can just barge onto our turf and walk away without payin' the price?