As the scene starts, the overdramatic Prince cries out that his heart is about to burst. Queen: Nonsense! What from? Your hands are uncalloused. Your back is straight. The spoon in your mouth is silver. And the hand that wipes your backside is not your own.

Later, the Queen scoffs and scolds when the Milkmaid, a strong farm girl, says she’s delicate. Queens: Don’t blaspheme, [blass-feem], child. I could bind you in chains for your fabrications. But I shan’t spoil my son’s nuptials. No. (Beat) So, I propose a test to glean your truthfulness. A wager if you will…. If you fail, you shall be branded a liar and banished from the kingdom. Immediately.

The Queen is outraged when the Milkmaid shows she’s been bruised by a pea in a palace bed. (Her digestion issues worsen, increasing from a 7 to an 8 on a scale of 10.) Queen: Liar! She arrived blemished, I say. Mendacious trollop! Lashed by her employer, no doubt. (then commands) Show me exactly where the pea is located.