[Person walks up to you][You're drunk]

(Mezzed)(Drunk) Hey-o, friend-o! Sorry, but this...(Burp)...bowl(Toilet) is already being used. (Giggles)

[Person says something threatening][You're too drunk to really do anything]

(Mezzed)(drunk) What did you say, motherfucker? (Burp) I'll have you know... that I have the right to... uh... bear arms. Yeah.

[Person threatens you again]

(Mezzed)(drunk) I'll show you, bitch! (Takes out revolver)(Bullets fly out) Ah, shit... them's my bullets. (Sleazy laugh)

[Person asks how many fingers are they holding up]

(Mezzed)(drunk) Um... uh... (Smacks lips)... yes. (Sleazy laugh)

[You're drunk][You're in the middle of throwing up]

(Mezzed)(drunk) AH, SHIT!!! THAT IS NOT PRETTY!!!

(Mezzed)(drunk) Big MT? More like Big PP, aye-yo!

(Mezzed)(Drunk)(Disgusted at your own vomit) WHAT IN SATAN'S RED ASSHOLE IS THAT!?!?!

(Mezzed)(Drunk) AT LEAST THIS IS GOOD SCOTCH, IT DOESN'T TASTE SO BAD COMING UP!!!

(Mezzed)(Drunk)(Crying) ANTHONY!!! I... (Burp)... I THINK I JUST VOMITED ON MY SHIRT!!! OH... (About to throw up again)...OH GOD!

(Mezzed)(Drunk)(CRYING) ANTHONY....(Burp)... I NEED MY BIBBY!!!

[You're singing a melody from a song][This song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcLk3fQ3Zwg ][You're drunk]

(Mezzed)(drunk)(Slurring words)

SO JUST CLOOOOSSE YOUR EYEEEESSS (So just close your eyes)
LISTEN TO A SWEEEEET LOOOLABYYYYYEEE (Listen to a sweet lullaby)
SLEEEEEEEP, SOFTLY SLEEEEEEP (Sleep, softly sleep)
AND LEEEEET THE WOOORRRLLLD COLLIIIIDDDE (And let the world collide)